Often, couples settle into their everyday lives and neglect to maintain that wonderful feeling that brought them together. Conversations become surface, the bedroom is mundane, quality time is absent, and the very essence of their togetherness seems to be routine. Seemingly they begin to take one another for granted. The significance of the relationship has passed and is now replaced monotonous behavior.
What happens to the flame that was ignited in the beginning? What about laughing until you cry while conversing or the excitement of seeing one another after a long day? Has time diminished these wonderful elements of your relationship? How do you suppose re-inventing your love?
What is it about LONGEVITY in relationships that seems to drain the creativity, spontaneity, passion and significance out of it?
My partner is my friend; we laugh, joke, talk, and have fun. My partner is my lover; we make love, explore sexual desires, make it our business to do 'new' things, express our hunger for one another and exhibit our affection. My partner understands me as I do her. We communicate without judgment or getting defensive. We continue to cultivate our relationship as it is important to us. LONGEVITY is what we seek so we do the things to ensure the years to come will be our reality.
5 comments:
date night is essential...and actually changing the day of the week for date night makes it even better. when the night of the week is changed it feels more new. you can go out or stay in. picnics by fireplaces. candle light dinner WITHOUT the tv and only music and your laughter to fill the background. You'd be amazed how that one thing could change the pace of things in your relationship.
making a conscious effort to never go to sleep without a kiss from your partner (or at least hearing their voice say good night i love you - for those not in the same home). my partner is my first kiss in the morning and my last kiss at night.
she is my best friend. yes there are arguments and times that one of us might take something personally. however, when you understand that you want to make this the last relationship of your life you find a way to be open and honest and come out of it all happy and healthier in love.
Very well stated Danyel!! :) I agree 100%...
I can honestly say that every day of my life with Anita just gets better and better. I have felt absolutely no need to keep the flame alive, because it seems to roar naturally. We've been together many years, and we have not lost a thing. We are definitely best friends and lovers. Being with her seems as natural as breathing. I'm certain she is, without question, my soulmate.
Greetings BJ,
Amen, sis! Your post is most eye opening and true. What many don't realize is that building a strong and healthy foundation, through normal changes that take place, along with The Character Building Experiences that happen along the natural progressive road in relationships, is what makes them truly last. Flames and passion can sometimes be put on the back burner, as life calls us to duty and attention, oftentimes leaving our intimacies neglected...
Danyel you hit the nail on the head and Benita that was beautiful, blessings to you both!
BJ, I commend you for exploring this topic and found enjoyment in reading your perspectives and expressions about your relationship. I am finding that there are very few of us who adapt the same philosophies and have found what we call the driving "IT" factor within our relationships. Many don't talk about the future goal and lose heart and become motionless. We appreciate your blog and can truly say that we are enjoying this journey with "Happi Pheet"! May everything that you both do prosper and continue to light the rainbow with your wisdom.
Belazadu'm
Yahminah McIntosh
www.phamli.blogspot.com
www.yahminahmcintosh.com
Well Once again I am proud to be in the company of such wisdom and experience... Yahminah summed it up and I to would like to thank you for sharing and caring! I love talking with my partner communication is the key and altho I am a very serious person I love to laugh, play, talk, joke and have fun as BJ expressed. I can feel if something is not right with my partner and feel it always necessary to resolve what ever it maybe. Whatever it is that we do outside our relations like jobs/careers we should be able to come together and release all of the outside and enjoy each other. Friendship is another very important quality in a love relationship. It is the foundation to Longevity in relationships!
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